There is more to "the question" in the post "Iterative Hero". Leading up to the question, didn't I have any good men in my life, was a complex series of exhaustive interactions and emotions. A series of events and circumstances that were requiring a level of tenderness that I was not or maybe still not capable of. The question came from a person who was dearest to me at the time. I, on the other hand, had not intended to be a villain, but regardless provoked an attitude that inspired "the question" to be asked. The question did not come from hatred but rather protection.
I have had a tough journey into parts of myself and society that have hardened my heart and softening it is taking an equal amount of discovery. Part of this newness is an inability to communicate my discovered principles. I have ideas that I think are worth making values, but I deliver them with carelessness. I am confrontational, antagonistic, and a even a villain.
I have become stubbornly comfortable with who I am. I have found that my understanding of my emotions, needs, and purpose might seem arrogantly composed, even to the point of being insolent. I am highly reactive to situations of hypocrisy. I have an unsociable and hostile way of proving a point. I can be rude and abusive. It isn't necessarily rooted in evil, but the lack of responsibility for my emotions influences my impulses to protect myself and worse my opinions.
This raw and difficult expression is my true self being as open as possible. So "the question" is not described here so that you can understand my sadness. I describe and write about "the question" so that I can observe how I have been immature and careless with my attitudes, especially towards those I love. My shadow needs to be seen as a good man, and my true self needs me to be a genuine man.
