Educating the human in me

I am finding that the most existential part of becoming educated is fully coming to terms with the reality that there is so much to be learned and only a lifetime to try and learn it in. I think what this does is create personalities, classes, philosophies, and oddly even injustice or insecurity.

The more I see how people make decisions, I can see how one might believe that natural selection is real. How can it not be as we see urban cultures starving rural environments. There are times in life when the fittest will survive, and there are times in life when people can live completely with altruistic intent. I can see how a Mother Theresa adds a remedy to the Darwinian attitude by suggesting that there are people who serve the inferior. There is no natural law or science that eliminates the possibility of either theory, leaving me to believe we can't live in one or even a dual mindset absolutely. There is a dependence on circumstance, evidence, curiosity, and emotion that leaves an infinite trail in an unknown number of directions. Victor Frankl expresses this non dual way of believing by describing how we are far more than our genetics, we are far more than our actions, we are completely human in that individually we have an ability to chose our attitude, and this is the direction one continues on when traversing life's infinite existence.

I have never felt more aware in my life. I expect to reach a phase when even this awareness will progress to a new stage of confusion. I think about how I once woke every morning to software problems to be solved, algorithms to discover, and statuses to be achieved, now I am on the outskirts of this mainstream human whirlwind of achievement. Now I am working towards appreciating my garbage man, my immigrant labor (legal and illegal), our recovering addicts, my teacher, my patterns, emptiness, where my food is grown, where I shop, my time with people, and the purpose of money.